What if you had a way to give free positive publicity to one of your key connections or influencers? Would you do it?

Recently I joined the community of More Clients More Fun to learn more ways to leverage the power of LinkedIn to build strong relationships.

I was intrigued with one of the strategies suggested by the program’s creators, Ana Melikian, Paul McManus and JoAnne Henein.

What’s the idea?

Set up a “Virtual Coffee” video call with the person online and record the conversation. You conduct the interview and focus the spotlight on the other person. 

Who could you interview?

- Current clients who know you well

Imagine this.

You have an idea for a book that you believe would be fantastic. You draft a proposal and send it to five publishers as a test. They all say no.

You try five more. They say no, too.

You’re discouraged but decide to double up and send your idea to TEN more publishers.

Still no takers.

That’s 20 indicators that your idea has no merit.

What would you do at this point?

Most people would give up. Maybe their idea wasn’t so great after all. Or it’s not worth the effort to keep trying.

Jack Canfield and Mark Victor Hansen faced far worse rejections than this when they were trying to find a publisher for their first Chicken Soup for the Soul book.

They got 144 rejections over a period of 18 months.

But all these rejections did not deter them. They had such a strong belief in their book that they simply moved on to a different publisher each time they got rejected.

Jack Canfield recounts their experience in this short video (2:18).



When you have an idea, goal, product or service that you deeply believe in, recognize that your opportunity can be realized if you commit to continue asking, no matter how many rejections you get.

Remind yourself of this wisdom from Jack Canfield:
“When the world says NO, you say NEXT.”

And then reflect on these inspiring words from people who’ve experienced first-hand the pain of failure, rejection and ridicule, yet persevered until they prevailed…

"If I had to select one quality, one personal characteristic that I regard as being most highly correlated with success whatever the field, I would pick the trait of persistence. Determination. The will to endure to the end, to get knocked down 70 times and get up off the floor saying, 'Here comes number 71!'" - Richard DeVos, American businessman (1926- )

“When you get into a tight place and everything goes against you, till it seems as though you could not hold a minute longer, never give up then, for that is just the place and time that the tide will turn.” - Harriet Beecher Stowe, American novelist (1811-1896)

"Always bear in mind that your own resolution to succeed is more important than any other thing." - Abraham Lincoln, American president (1809-1865)

"I will persist until I succeed. Always will I take another step. If that is of no avail I will take another, and yet another. In truth, one step at a time is not too difficult... I know that small attempts, repeated, will complete any undertaking." - Og Mandino, American author (1923-1996)

"It's not that I'm so smart, it's just that I stay with problems longer." - Albert Einstein, American physicist (1879-1955)

“If you can’t fly, then run, if you can’t run, then walk, if you can’t walk, then crawl, but whatever you do, you have to keep moving forward.” - Martin Luther King, Jr., American civil rights leader (1929-1968)

An unforgettable episode aired recently on the CBS show, 60 minutes. Without question, it’s my favorite one to date, highlighting a man whose life will inspire you to be a better person.



Coach Frank Hall was on duty in the Chardon High School cafeteria on the morning of February 27, 2012, when a 17 year-old student walked in and fired 10 rounds into the crowd of students. Six students went down, and Coach Hall immediately chased the student even as the gunman fired his weapon at the coach. The student ran out the building and was caught shortly afterwards by police in the woods. The coach returned to the cafeteria to comfort the injured students as best he could until the medics arrived. Three students had injuries so severe, they did not survive.

No doubt, the coach's actions saved many other lives that day.

Many viewers, as I did, probably thought this story would move into a political statement about stronger gun control laws or a study of why our schools are less safe today.

But that’s not the direction it took.

Instead, we were given a very special gift: the picture of a man whose very being is a finely tuned work of character.

Coach Hall had prepared for this day by the way he lived every minute of his life. He and his wife have four adopted sons, and they're raising these children in a loving environment with clearly stated boundaries, expectations and values.

He was the beloved assistant coach of the football team, inspiring his players daily to give their best effort.

But the memories of that day haunted him. And then he decided to leave that school to become the head coach of a nearby school where the kids “needed him more.”

The turn-around in the lives of those football players was dramatic. One incident in particular illustrates the ripple effect Coach Hall’s leadership had on each player on that team.

One of the football players had “smarted off” to a teacher in the school. Coach Hall required every player on the team to apologize to that teacher, not just the offending player. Two of the players talked about this on-camera and you could tell that they agreed with the coach’s mandate. All the players developed a sense of accountability – individually and for each other. The entire dynamic changed, and they went on to win all but one of their games that season.

Invest 13 minutes to watch this segment (13:26). You’ll discover the power of one human being to touch the lives of others in a profound, lasting way.

I used to work with someone who had a habit of saying, “If anything can go wrong, it will.” Whenever he experienced any kind of setback, he interpreted it as confirmation that things always turned out badly for him.

He honestly believed that he was destined to have awful things happen to him and that he had no control over the outcomes.

ALL of us experience unexpected, negative events in our lives. When you have to deal with this kind of challenge, it’s easy to feel that life’s against you. The difficulties are right in your face, so you focus on them and completely overlook any positive aspects of the situation. You can get discouraged and lose sight of the choices you do have.

It turns out that our beliefs and attitudes dramatically affect what happens to us.

When you’re pessimistic, you anticipate and dwell on the worst-case scenario. You create a movie in your mind of the result you don’t want and play it over and over.

But focusing exclusively on the negatives like this can actually cause your worst fears to be realized. You can end up feeling like a victim and concluding there’s nothing you can do.

Stopping this vicious cycle requires a shift from pessimism to optimism.

Now that doesn’t mean putting on rose-colored glasses and pretending that all is right with the world. It means learning to recognize that every situation in life has both positives and negatives.

With optimism, you see both aspects, but you make a conscious decision to emphasize possibilities and opportunities instead of disasters and problems. You take responsibility for things you can control, and you don’t feel bad or guilty about areas outside of your control.

The attitude you bring to a situation strongly influences its outcome. If you’re convinced things will turn out badly, you probably won’t take steps to achieve the best result.

Open your mind to the positives as well as the negatives, and your worldview will be more complete. If you remember what you have going for you, it will have a major impact on the way you respond and the outcome you achieve.

Take inspiration this 2-minutes clip with Dr. Martin Seligman, who explains the difference between an optimist and a pessimistic – and why the optimist demonstrates greater resilience.

Ever think about what it would take to make you really happy? To feel a deep sense of joy?

Some people say they need a certain amount of money.

Others focus on lifestyle, travel, a stress-free job, or free time.

Many want more time with family and friends.

This uplifting video (7:14) shows the surprising role that GRATITUDE plays in achieving real, deeply satisfying happiness.



Yet there’s a dark side to joy. Author and researcher Brene’ Brown states that the most terrifying, difficult emotion that we experience as humans is…joy.

How can this be? Would you ever think of associating “joy” with “terror”?

Watch this powerful exchange between Oprah Winfrey and Brene’ Brown to find out why Dr. Brown makes such a disconcerting statement, and yet prescribes GRATITUDE as the solution.

Sometimes a simple, three-minute video can touch your heart and make you pause.

That’s what happened to me when I watched this Thai ad.



You never know the ripple effect that your words and actions can have on another human being.

I still remember criticism I got as a child from well-meaning adults and how that hurt.

But I also recall when someone offered encouragement or performed some act of kindness for me.

Every person you encounter is experiencing some kind of pain or challenge. You don’t have to know what it is.

Just reach out when you’re able to, with a thoughtful, positive word or gesture.

Your caring at that moment could have a lasting impact on another’s life.

“Kind words can be short and easy to speak, but their echoes are truly endless.” - Mother Teresa

It’s been more than 30 years since Dustin Hoffman played the starring role in the movie Tootsie.

This now-classic film required him to dress up as a woman in order to play the character of Dorothy Michaels.

But before he agreed to play the part, he had a requirement.

He didn’t want to look like a man dressed in drag. He wanted to be seen as a woman when walking down the streets of New York City.

That, he was able to do.

But when he saw himself on film after these initial clips were made, he realized that he didn't want to look like an ordinary woman.

He wanted to be a beautiful woman.

After making this request, he learned that no amount of make-up and Hollywood wizardry could transform him into “beautiful.”

This response shook him to the core, and he arrived at one of the most profound insights of his life.

Watch this short video with Dustin Hoffman to see first-hand the impact this role had on his life and his attitude about women.



The lesson here goes far beyond the attribute of beauty as it applies to a woman. Or the attribute of handsome as it applies to a man.

The larger take-away is for each of us to think about the prejudices and beliefs we hold about anyone we perceive as different from us.

How do your attitudes impact the way you interact with people who are not like you?

I encourage you to monitor the thoughts that rush into your head when you meet someone new…or run into an acquaintance you've brushed off in the past due to concluding that person “unworthy” of your time in some way.

What if you kept an open mind and looked for the treasure you might uncover from each person you meet in life?

Jake Davidson and companion in the opening scene of his video

Have you ever thought of doing something audacious but talked yourself out of it because you were afraid of failing...or concerned about what other people might think?

Recently two young people took a risk and it paid off in ways they never expected.

Talia Myers, a USC student majoring in film-making and daughter of my colleague Gordon Myers, created a YouTube video that garnered more than 2 million views in less than a week.

How did she do that?

It’s all because a young man named Jake Davidson decided that he wanted to invite supermodel Kate Upton to his high school senior prom. But he had to find a way to get her attention. That’s where Talia’s expertise came in.

Together they created a two-minute video that resulted in instant celebrity for Jake after Kate responded with this tweet:


The news media got hold of the story and during the next few days Jake was featured on several national TV and radio programs. He became an overnight sensation.

This is the video that started it all…



I know it’s unlikely that you’ll be making a video to invite a famous person out on a date, but Jake and Talia exhibited three personal strengths that you can use, too.

CREATIVITY

The video stood out. Talia and Jack took a unique approach – incorporating an engaging story and humor into a compelling invitation – and it got Kate’s attention.

Sometimes we base goals on our past experience or what we’ve seen those around us do. Let your imagination run wild. Think BIG. Brainstorm the most fantastic outcome you could hope for, and ask yourself what you need to do to make that a reality.

COURAGE

Jake had no idea if Kate would even respond. But if he hadn’t asked, he would have remained unknown to her. And these publicity opportunities would certainly never have happened.

Examine what holds you back from stepping out of your comfort zone and taking a risk. Think about the worst that could happen. Often, it’s not that bad! Even if you fail, you can learn from the experience. And you’ll realize you can do far more than you originally thought possible.

CONFIDENCE

I think another reason Jake got Kate’s attention was the self-assurance he displays throughout the video. Based on her tweet above and her phone conversation with him on the Today Show, she was clearly taken with him and his approach.

People can sense when you are confident…and when you’re not. Give yourself credit for what you’ve done in the past. You have prevailed in the face of many difficulties in your life. Let those successes remind you to remain poised when presenting your ideas to others.

As the years pass by and you find that you haven't accomplished what you'd hoped, you may feel disappointed, frustrated and unhappy with yourself. At those moments, think of Susan Boyle, who at age 47, shocked the world with her magnificent voice on the TV show, Britain's Got Talent, which aired last spring.

Grab your favorite beverage, sit back and watch how she transformed the attitude of the audience and the panel when she began singing "I Dreamed a Dream."

Randy Pausch's "Last Lecture" became one of the most-watched videos on YouTube in 2007 as he inspired millions with his speech laced with humor, despite battling pancreatic cancer. He later published a best-selling book by the same name. In the spring of 2008, just two months before his death, he was invited to address the graduating class of Carnegie Mellon University, where he was a professor. In this 6-minute presentation, he encourages the audience to live fully and find your passion.



Randy truly left an inspiring legacy for his children and the rest of us.  

Some challenges are so great that they bring us to our knees. This remarkable story about father-son team, Dick and Rick Hoyt, proves that we can create our own success - despite overwhelming obstacles.